


Three Years

by Remmy-AoT (Remembrance)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Best Friends, Childhood Friends, Complicated Relationships, Cute, Dorks, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-22
Updated: 2014-03-22
Packaged: 2018-01-16 11:22:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,200
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1345648
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Remembrance/pseuds/Remmy-AoT
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Nobody knows why Eren and Armin, the closest of friends, just suddenly stopped talking to each other three years ago, but one thing is clear: Eren really wants his best friend back in his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Three Years

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Shota-Baby-Prince-Armin](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=Shota-Baby-Prince-Armin).



> I got anon hate yesterday because I post too much Eren/Armin. The only proper way to reply is to post more Eren/Armin. LOL. So, I wrote this for the coronation of [Shota-Baby-Prince-Armin (Tumblr)](http://shota-baby-prince-armin.tumblr.com/) (great blog if you want some Eremin on your dash!)... and by that I mean this may or may not just be an excuse for more Eremin.

* * *

 

 

Eren was dreaming.  
  
He was dreaming that they were together on a train. They were sitting next to each other on soft, plush seats, first class quality, but tarnished brown in colour. They were wrapped up in a blue blanket, cuddling beneath it. Armin had been alternating between pressing his face against the glass window to see the world outside and leaning back against Eren, whose arm was hooked around his waist. They were close, very close, closer than best friends should have been, if they were even best friends.  
  
Eren’s green eyes shifted to the window, where the flora and fauna made itself known: He saw brown deer, spotted cows, white horses, tall green maple trees, some red and yellow since it was autumn, and blooming pink cherry blossoms blooming since it was also spring.  
  
Armin looked back. _“There, Eren!”_  
  
The train submerged underwater, sea life swirled around the train car.  
  
Armin’s eyes were wide and he started counting the rainbow fish moving in a swirling school of them. He pointed at several octopi. _“Look, Eren.”_ He smiled wide.  
  
That smile.  
  
Eren swore his heart leaped into his throat and he couldn’t help but nervously smile back, cheeks burning.  
  
  
 _“Wake up, Eren.”_  
  
  
“Nnn…”  
  
  
The marine life faded.  
  
The train car faded.  
  
The blanket faded.  
  
Armin faded, and that smile faded with him.  
  
The warmth faded.  
  
  
He was cold.  
  
  
Very cold.  
  
Eren pulled the bed sheets over him and slowly opened his eyes. He was staring up at the ceiling but saw a figure looming over him.  
  
“Eren.”  
  
Eren looked at her and gave a wry smile.  
  
Mikasa stared at him. “You were crying in your sleep.”  
  
“Was I?” Eren blinked several times and rubbed his face in an attempt to rub away the grogginess. He sat up slowly and felt the moisture in the corner of his eyes. “Huh…”  
  
Mikasa took a seat on the edge of the bed. She glanced to the clock before her black eyes drifted back to him. “What were you dreaming about, Eren?”  
  
“Uh… well… Armin.”  
  
Mikasa paused.  
  
“We were… Well, we took a train ride together. It was, nice.”  
  
Mikasa’s gaze softened and she looked away. “It’s seven thirty. We should get ready for school.”  
  
“Oh shit, yeah.”

⁂

  
  
Armin was studying.  
  
He was sitting at a small table at the corner of the library, flipping through the colourful pages of his biology textbook. He examined the green diagram and took notes. The xylem and the phloem, the two main transportations in plants—one moved water and minerals from the base to the leaves, the other moved food created through photosynthesis from the leaves to the base.  
  
Footsteps.  
  
He looked up and he smiled. “Hey!”  
  
Mikasa smiled as well, but hers was shaky. “Can I sit here.”  
  
Armin pretended to pout. “Mikasa, come on, you know you don’t need to ask, right?”  
  
She silently chuckled and nodded. She pulled out the chair and took a seat. She moved some hair out of her face. “It’s been a while since we’ve talked, hasn’t it?”  
  
“Yeah.” Armin’s smile faltered and he bit his lip. “Is everything alright?”  
  
“Possibly.” She glanced to the windows, watching other students throw around a pink Frisbee. “I probably shouldn’t tell you, but… Well, I… I’ve noticed, Eren says your name in his sleep a lot. He’s always been a sleep talker, so I’m not surprised, but he’s been saying your name lately. I asked him what he was dreaming about today… He said he dreamed about you two on a train together.”  
  
Armin stayed silent before he started packing up.  
  
Mikasa blinked. “Armin?”  
  
“I have to go.”  
  
“Armin, don’t run away from me, I’m trying to hel–”  
  
“I have to go.”

⁂

  
  
Eren was changing clothes.  
  
He was in the change room. The gym class rotated who took down the equipment, and it had been Jean, Marco, and himself who had to do it. For that reason, the three of them were the only ones there while they threw their gym clothes off in a blur and put on their normal clothes just as quick.  
  
“Hey, Eren.”  
  
Eren glanced to the side.  
  
Jean was leaning against the wall of blue lockers as he crossed his arms. “You used to be real tight with Armin, right? Like a couple years back? You don’t happen to know if he’s gay, do you? I mean rumour has it he is, but I don’t want to get my hopes up for nothing. Is he into guys? Would he like me? Does he have a type of guy or something like that? Best friends know these things.”  
  
Eren stared at him.  
  
“Jean,” Marco sighed, “You can’t just ask that!”  
  
“What? Why not?”  
  
“Because! It’s not like Eren’s just going to out Armin, _if_ he’s gay, and even if he was he wouldn’t do it to you.”  
  
Jean almost looked hurt. “What? Of course he would! I could be his boyfriend.” He looked at Eren. “I’ll get him flowers and totally take him on dates! I could make Armin happy, no sweat, and isn’t that the important part?”  
  
Eren closed the locker door.  
  
Marco sighed, shaking his head.  
  
Eren stared at the closed door before pursing his lips. “Carnations.”  
  
“Uh,” Jean blinked, “What?”  
  
“Armin likes carnations.” Eren grabbed his gym clothes and shoved it into his bag. “You said you’d get him flowers, so get him carnations. They’re white flowers, but if you put them in water with some food colouring, they drink it and they can be coloured… so you can have a lot of fun with them. It only takes a couple days. His favourite colour is blue. Like the ocean. And, for a date… aquarium. He loves fish and stuff like that. And, yeah, I guess you’re his type. He likes idiots: He likes anyone he’s too good for.”  
  
Jean’s eyes narrowed and he tilted his head. “I… don’t know how to reply to that.”  
  
Marco seemed to share the confusion as he blinked. “Um… was that an insult? I honestly can’t tell.”  
  
“Me neither.” Jean shrugged. “Well, thanks man, Armin likes carnations and aquariums, got it.”  
  
“Oh.”  
  
The three of them jumped and turned to the entrance of the change room.  
  
Armin was hugging a textbook against his chest. The smallest of smiles were on his lips as he glanced to Eren. “You remembered…”  
  
Eren visibly stiffened before giving an awkward nod. “Yeah.”

⁂

  
  
Armin was walking home.  
  
He was walking through the woods near the school, his usual path. The smell of pine and cedar filled his nostrils and he found nature to be relaxing. He had a spring in his step, and he didn’t know why. Well, that wasn’t entirely true: He did know why. Eren. It had been the first time in several years that he actually talked to Eren… not that such a quick exchange could have really been considered ‘talking’, but… it was what? Two years? Three years?  
  
He wasn’t sure.  
  
He just kept walking.  
  
As he stepped out of the woods, he swallowed hard.  
  
 _“Disgusting fag!”_  
  
He took a deep breath.  
  
 _“I love you.”_  
  
He stopped and shook his head. “Why am I thinking about that now?” He shook his head again, trying to shake away the thoughts that clotted his brain.

⁂

  
  
Eren was at the dinner table.  
  
The conversation was alive. His dad (who was usually sour because it was the toughest season at work) was in a good mood for the first time in weeks. He was notably chattier than usual and complimented Mikasa several times on dinner. Eren noticed how the positivity infected his mother, and even his sister was smiling more than usual. Eren forced a smile, only because he didn’t want to bring anyone down with his own feelings.  
  
The topic at hand eventually dwindled and everyone focused on their meal.  
  
Eren was turning a fork of spaghetti against his spoon to coil it up—the way Armin taught him years ago—when he looked up. “It’s great,” he said, only to ease the silence.  
  
“Thank you.” Mikasa nodded slowly. Her smile faded and she tilted her head, long black hair shifting with the movement. “Eren… I heard you talked to Armin today.”  
  
Eren’s hands froze.  
  
“Why?” Mikasa sensed the discomfort and looked away. “Why… did you two stop talking?”  
  
Carla’s eyes softened as they shifted to her son. “It was so sudden… You two were in your diapers together one day, and then the next you just pretended you never knew each other.”  
  
Eren took a deep breath. He calculated his words, trying to come up with something intelligent, but he sighed. “I guess we just stopped talking because… Well, people are stupid, and we do stupid things, and I’m stupid. It’s not important.”  
  
Carla glanced to her meal. “I still talk to Armin’s parents you know.”  
  
“I know.”  
  
“They say he’s been lonely.” Carla’s eyes didn’t move from her plate. “You know, you were the reason he went out, now he just buries himself at home and reads books. You two should talk it over and make up and move on.”  
  
Eren shook his head. “It’s not that simple, mom.”  
  
“Isn’t it?” Grisha raised an eyebrow. “What keeps it from being simple, Eren? You could easily say it’s complicated, it’s hard, you could make any excuse, you could say it’s not that simple and you can’t just fix it with an apology, but what if you did? Would it hurt to try?”  
  
Eren looked at him and felt his words get stuck in his throat.  
  
“Eren,” Grisha sighed, “When you reach my age, all you’ll have is regrets. Don’t let this be one of them. If it doesn’t work out, it doesn’t work out, but you should at least try. What do you have to lose?”  
  
Mikasa stared at him and frowned. “Eren… what happened between you two?”

⁂

  
  
Armin was in the hallway.  
  
He was putting up with harassment.  
  
“So, you’re a fag, aren’t you? So you wanna suck my dick?”  
  
Armin rolled his eyes. He ignored it and grabbed another book from his locker.”  
  
“I’ve got a big cock, you know!”  
  
Armin said nothing. He had always been the type of person who invalidated his problems. In other schools, kids were bullied, shoved in lockers, completely ostracised for being gay; here, although he never came out, many other students knew and he was accepted, welcomed. The only issue he had to put up with was the occasional verbal abuse of that one guy who was under the impression that he was a hot piece of meat everyone wanted. It could always be worse. Armin figured he didn’t have the right to complain. It could always be worse. He closed his locker and locked it. He spun the dial of his lock and felt his patience run thin.  
  
“Come on man, I need a blowie.”  
  
Armin pursed his lips. In the morning, Jean was hitting on him (a lot more politely than this guy), but with both of them on the same day he wanted to stab someone.  
  
“You’re lucky I’m asking you, you know?”  
  
“Shut it,” Armin muttered. “I’m not sucking your little dick. Just fuck off.”  
  
The guy put his hands on Armin’s hips and began grinding against his backside. “Come on, babe!”  
  
Armin spun around and shoved him hard.  
  
The guy stumbled back and let out a wimpy noise.  
  
Armin’s eyes narrowed. “Don’t touch me.”  
  
“Aw man, I was just playing!”  
  
Armin was about to say something, but—  
  
“Just playing?”  
  
Armin turned to see Eren and he felt his chest squeeze.  
  
Eren frowned. “Why don’t you go play somewhere else, you creep.”  
  
The guy laughed and crossed his arms. “What are you? His boyfriend?”  
  
Armin felt his throat tighten.  
  
Eren’s gaze never left the guy. “So what if I am? What are you going to do? Call me a fag? Go ahead. Do it. Call me a fag. I’ll beat the shit out of you. You know I will, and I know you’re just a pathetic wimp.”  
  
Armin was secretly hoping Eren _would_ beat up the creep, but he didn’t stick around to see how the confrontation ended—He ran. He slipped away from them and ran down the hall, quickly turning the corner.

⁂

  
  
Eren was searching.  
  
He was searching for Armin, for the person that was once his best friend. His instincts told him to check the library first, but he had no luck there. He searched the halls, the classrooms, the cedar tree Armin always sat under during lunch, and he eventually went to the woods Armin had to pass walking home—Nothing. He couldn’t find him. He sighed loudly and ran a hand through his thick black hair.  
  
His green eyes caught sight of a little clearing.  
  
There was no blondie, but there were six logs, arranged away that formed a small circle. He remembered when they were younger, how they would go there and sit as a group. Armin would always sit on one side, and Mikasa on the other. Occasionally Mikasa would sit next to Annie or Ymir, but Armin always sat next to him, _always_. He didn’t know why back then, but now he did.  
  
He crossed the distance and took a seat.  
  
He remembered Jean and Marco would always sit next to each other, then the troublemakers Sasha and Connie. Reiner and Bert, Annie, Krista, Ymir…  
  
Eren sighed. “It’s been a while since I came here.”  
  
After he and Armin… He never came by these woods again. He avoided them the same way he avoided Armin. The only thing past these woods was a residential area; so, essentially, these woods were Armin’s woods… or at least that’s how his young mind associated it.  
  
He remembered his dream of the train ride…  
  
He looked at his hands and silently wondered where Armin could have gone. He pursed his lips, realising that at this time, he probably went…

⁂

  
  
Armin was at home.  
  
He was reading.  
  
He ran straight home, avoiding both his confused parents, and went to his room. He picked up his favourite book off the shelf—the one he had read fourteen times—and opened to a random page and began reading, anything to distract him from his own thoughts. He read the lines of the random page and smiled when he realised it was the hot spring scene, that one always made him smile.  
  
When the doorbell rang, he thought nothing of it; he heard his dad’s thumping footsteps move to the front door and then,  
  
“Eren!” the loud guffawing voice travelled through the house.  
  
Armin’s head shot up.  
  
“H-Hi,” there was a meekness to Eren’s voice, “Is Armin home?”  
  
Armin swallowed hard.  
  
“Yes he is! He’s in his room.”  
  
“May I come in, Sir?”  
  
“Of course, Eren. Don’t start that Sir stuff with me, though.”  
  
Armin heard Eren laugh and that laugh made his heart flutter; it was deeper than when they were kids, but it was still a light tenor, with a timbre that playfully tugged at a cord inside him.  
  
Footsteps moved towards his room.  
  
He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. He winced, waiting for the door to swing open; but, luckily, there were two knocks. Armin relaxed and forced himself to smile. He swallowed hard and looked at the white door. He closed his book and cleared his throat. “Come in.”  
  
The door opened and Eren gave a small wave. “Hey.”  
  
“Hi.”  
  
Eren looked around and chuckled. “Wow, your room’s pretty much the same… just a couple more posters and some—Oh, hey!” He grinned as he glanced to a band poster near Armin’s bed. “You’re a fan of Angel Curve too?”  
  
“Um, yeah.”  
  
“That’s awesome. I don’t know anyone else at school who even _knows_ them, except Jean but I don’t want to talk to him about it. That’s awesome.”  
  
“Yeah, I don’t know anyone who knows them either.” Armin put his book on the bedside table and looked at him. “What do you want?”  
  
“Ah, well, uh…” He bit his lip, “Well, I… I sort of came over, because, well, I…” He sighed and walked over. He took a seat on Armin’s bed, next to him, and sighed again. He smiled a smile that was clearly forced. “I’m… I came here to say, I’m sorry.”  
  
“Okay, you’re forgiven,” Armin said quickly, “Please leave.”  
  
Eren stayed silent and scratched the back of his head. “No, you… don’t understand, Armin.”  
  
“I do.”  
  
“Armin.”  
  
“Bye.”  
  
Eren turned to face him and his eyes watered.  
  
Armin almost gasped but stopped himself. He swallowed hard and looked away, closing his eyes. “Please, Eren. Just leave, leave me alone, okay?”  
  
Eren looked at Armin, longing to be as close as they once were. He sighed. “Okay.” He leaned over and closed his eyes. He kissed Armin’s cheek once and nodded. “Okay. I’m going. I’m sorry. For everything.”  
  
Armin opened his eyes and looked at Eren, but he was already leaving. He almost called out, but he didn’t. He wanted to, but he didn’t. Eren was gone. He raised a hand, gently grazing his fingertips to where Eren kissed him, feeling the small speck of moisture from those lips.

⁂

  
  
Eren was at home, again.  
  
He was sitting at the dinner table. He walked through the front door, put his jacket on the rack, and eventually took his seat.  
  
Carla noticed him, pity in her eyes. “Still moping?”  
  
“Yeah, but,” Eren gave a strained smile, “I apologised.”  
  
Carla frowned. “For what?”  
  
“For…” Eren shrugged. “Everything, I guess.”  
  
Hearing Eren’s voice, Mikasa came in the room, cellphone in hand. “Armin asked about you.”  
  
Eren blinked and looked at her. “Wait, what? When? Why?”  
  
“Five minutes ago? He sent me a text. He asked how you were, and if everything was alright with you.”  
  
Eren stared at her for a full minute before he swallowed hard. “What did you say back?”  
  
“Well.” Mikasa moved some long strands of black hair out of her face and tucked them behind her ear. “I told him you were… mostly, okay, but he could ask you for details. I figured it would be the best course of action… I hope, at least.”  
  
Eren smiled and nodded. “Thanks.”

⁂

  
  
Armin was in the hallway, again.  
  
Jean was leaning against one of the locker, going on about something or another. He had been blabbing about movies they could see together, and he was quite excited about the one where, spoilers, everything blew up at the end.  
  
Armin wasn’t that interested, but a lack of sleep from the night before washed away his usual patience. “You’re an idiot, Jean.”  
  
Jean’s words faltered as he sputtered, coming to a messy verbal halt.  
  
Armin shook his head, almost angrily. “Jean… You’re so blind. Your best friend has the biggest crush in the world, and he’s crushing on you.”  
  
Jean blinked several times and tilted his head. “Wh-What?” His cheeks heated up. “M-Marco?”  
  
“You… really can’t tell, can you?” Armin sighed. “He wants to be yours, and he wants you to be his. It’s all over his face, Jean. It’s more obvious than his freckles.”  
  
“No way!” Jean frowned. “Marco’s not gay… at least, he hasn’t told me…”  
  
“Just because Marco hasn’t come out to you, or me, or anyone, doesn’t mean he’s not gay.”  
  
“But, _I’m_ gay, Armin, so, like, he would feel comfortable telling me if he was, wouldn’t he?”  
  
“Well, sure…” Armin looked up at him. “If he wasn’t crushing on you like Sasha does over boy bands.” A sad smile formed on his lips. “I see the way he looks at you… I, I also see the way you look at him. And to top it all off, I also see the jealous looks Marco’s giving me because you’re interested in me; it’s, actually, kind of cute, because he knows he’s doing it and he’s trying to be happy for us so he tries to be nice to me right away after he does it. He’s such a great guy, Jean… you’re so incredibly lucky to have him, so don’t throw that away. Trust me, I can tell when best friends are in love.”  
  
“Wow. You sound like you’re talking from experience.” Jean paused and his own words set in. “Oh! Is that… what happened, with Eren? Why you and him suddenly stopped talking?”  
  
“Yeah. I told him I was in love with him.” Armin slammed his locker shut. “He called me a faggot.”  
  
Jean’s eyebrows shot up.  
  
“But…” Armin frowned, and he looked down, eyes becoming unfocused as they stared at a non-existent point. “Lately he… Well, he said he was sorry. He kissed me on the cheek. What… what does that mean?”  
  
“Hmm.”  
  
Armin’s head perked up and he turned to Jean. “Sorry. I didn’t mean to say that out loud. I’m just thinking things over, ignore it.”  
  
“That’s cool.” Jean chuckled. “But, from what I know of Eren… I mean, okay, let’s face it: He does _not_ apologise. And he sure as hell doesn’t do it easily. If he blew up a city of millions, he still wouldn’t feel a need to say sorry.”  
  
Armin chuckled as well. “That does sound like the Eren I know… I guess, he must really feel guilty.”  
  
“Hmm, yeah. Or maybe he kinda regrets it?”  
  
“Regret?” Armin’s brows knitted together. “Regret what?”  
  
Jean scratched the back of his head. “Well, it’s just a theory, but Eren’s been acting strange every time I ask him about you. So I’m just sort of wondering, if I never noticed the way Marco’s been looking at me, it might be that you’re not noticing the way Eren’s looking at you. Maybe he’s interested in y—”  
  
“-I have to go.” Armin grabbed his things. “Sorry. Bye.”

⁂

  
  
Eren was walking in the woods near the school.  
  
Eren was walking to the little alcove with the six logs.  
  
He needed to clear his head. He needed to think. He was going to head home when he remembered that spot, that spot that seemed like a good place he could work out his thoughts. As he made his way, he paused. His green eyes caught sight of blond hair and he felt his fingers twitch.  
  
Armin.  
  
He was sitting on one of the logs, looking at his feet.  
  
Eren took a deep breath and crossed the distance. He hesitated but he eventually took a seat next to the blond.  
  
Armin raised his head and stared at him. “Hi.”  
  
“Hey.” Eren smiled; as soon as he saw Armin smile back, he grinned. That smile, Armin’s smile, the smile that could make his palms sweaty and his heart beat faster. “Armin…” That smile, he would do anything for that smile. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Armin took a deep breath and nodded. “I know.”  
  
“No, just, you don’t, okay?” Eren closed his eyes. “Don’t cut me off, okay?”  
  
Armin tilted his head but nodded. “Okay.”  
  
Eren took a deep breath. “You’re smart, and not just smart, you’re fucking brilliant. And you’re not just smart at math or sciences, you’re cultured, you know about the world, about different societies, you know about life, you know about people, and you know about yourself.”  
  
Armin narrowed his eyes, trying to understand what Eren was trying to get at.  
  
“Like, what do you call it, when you know a lot about yourself? We studied it, uh… interpersonal intelligence?”  
  
“Intra,” he corrected, “Inter means others or outside, like international. Intra means inside. Intrapersonal means about the self.”  
  
“See? You’re a genius.” Eren looked at his feet. “Yeah, you have that. You know about yourself, and you’ve always known about yourself. You said you loved me, and if I was a quarter of what you are, I should have told you that… I love you back.”  
  
“Eren, we should stop.” Armin’s blue eyes widened and he stood up. “I should go–”  
  
“Don’t cut me off.” Eren frowned before his expression softened. “Please, Armin. I need to say this, I really need to say this, so please… You don’t owe me anything, I know that, so if you want to go then go, but please.”  
  
Armin swallowed hard and took his seat again. “Okay.”  
  
“When you told me… we were thirteen, Armin. _Thirteen_ , I was an idiot… well I still am an idiot, but I was really an idiot back then. I didn’t know about my sexuality, I didn’t know I was bi—Fuck, I still don’t know if I’m bi, but I knew I had feelings for you, I knew that much. But, unlike you, I didn’t come to terms with myself, I was fighting myself over it. So I was always just pretending I didn’t like you like that. I wasn’t _ready_ to accept myself, so, when you told me how you felt… you sort of put me on the hot seat. I freaked out. I did the first logical thing that came to mind: I tried to hurt you so I could push you away. I called you a fag, I shoved you, said you were disgusting, all because I couldn’t come to terms with myself.”  
  
Armin’s eyes fell to the grass beneath his shoes.  
  
“I’m not saying it’s your fault.” Eren closed his eyes. “And I’m not saying that it excuses what I did just because I was fighting myself about my sexuality. Nothing excuses what I said or did. Nothing. I said things I should have never said, not to my best friend, not to someone who cared for me. I was just… I was so fucking scared… I was scared, and afraid. And I wish—I _wish_ I could have been like you. I wish I could have been someone who knew these things about myself, I wish I could have accepted myself earlier. Armin… I know it’s been a long ass time, so you probably don’t feel the same way anymore about me, and that’s okay, I understand… but I still do. I still love you. I love you.”  
  
“Eren.” His eyes were wide.  
  
“I’m sorry…” Eren knew his eyes were watering and he wiped them with his arm. “I ruined everything, I’m so sorry.”  
  
“No…” Armin shook his head. “All these years… I never considered… I mean, I knew when we were thirteen, you used to hug me a little too long, a little too tight… I would catch you looking at me a little too long and I would pretend not to notice…” His cheeks had a tinge of pink and he smiled. “I remember analysing it all… I probably still have my notebook somewhere.”  
  
“You… used a notebook?”  
  
“Yep.”  
  
“You used a notebook to analyse my gayness?”  
  
Armin chuckled. “Yep.” He brought both hands to his cheeks and felt his face. He knew he was blushing and it only embarrassed him a little more. “I confirmed that you must have been gay, or at least into guys. I was into guys. So I decided everything would go great. It never crossed my mind—not once in all these years—that you would need time to accept your… gayness.”  
  
Eren snorted.  
  
Armin laughed as well as his eyes became unfocused. “Hindsight is twenty-twenty, because now all I can think is ‘Of course he wouldn’t have, he was only thirteen’, but… Why didn’t I consider it before?”  
  
“Well.” Eren scratched his cheek. “You never struggled with your sexuality, did you?”  
  
Armin shook his head. “No. I just always knew.”  
  
“I like that about you.”  
  
“Huh?”  
  
“You’re just so…” Eren smiled. “You’re so open with yourself. It makes me feel like I should try to be more like that to, but… damnit, it’s not easy.”  
  
Armin smiled and he looked at his lap, fumbling his hands together. “We all move at our own pace, Eren.”  
  
“Yeah.” Eren sighed. “I just wish I didn’t take so long. Too late now.” He got up slowly. “Anyway… thank you, Armin. Honestly, thank you, for listening to me. I’ll leave you alone now.”  
  
“Wait!” Armin frowned. “Where the fuck are you going?”  
  
Eren blinked several hundred times. “Um… Well, home?”  
  
“You… You said you loved me.”  
  
“Yeah, I did.”  
  
“So, Eren… come on, this is the part you—you know—k-kiss m-me.”  
  
Eren’s green eyes widened. “Wh-What? N-No! It’s been like th-three years, there’s no way you feel the same way for a complete jerk loser like me… You couldn’t be in love with an idiot for three years!”  
  
Armin’s eyes softened and he let out a laugh, light and airy.  
  
Eren swallowed hard.  
  
“You’re right, I didn’t pine for you three years straight, but… talking to you now… it feels just like it did when we were young. And now that I understand how you feel…” Armin grinned, cheeks red. “It’s sort of, bringing it all back, my feelings… I mean, I loved you for a long time, and I mean I _loved_ you Eren, not just a crush. I’m seriously talking about when we were back in preschool and we used to cuddle together during nap time, and how you would get mad if I wasn’t under your blankie… I loved you. Or… well, I guess, it would be more accurate to say, I love you.”  
  
Eren’s brain decided not to work at that moment.  
  
Armin scratched his cheek and waited. He laughed nervously and wiggled in his seat. “Eren!”  
  
“Wh-What?” he jumped back.  
  
“You can’t just say nothing after I declare something as big as that!”  
  
“Sorry!” Eren felt like his knees were going to give out so he took his seat next to Armin again. “So, you mean… Like, really?”  
  
“Yeah…” Armin closed his eyes. “S-So, hurry up and do it.”  
  
“Huh? Do what?”  
  
“You fucking moron!” Armin’s face was bright red. “Kiss me!”  
  
“Oh!” Eren’s eyes went wide and he leaned forward.  
  
They both closed their eyes, ignoring the nervous laughs between their lips, and kissed. It was slow, and a little awkward, but both their cheeks flushed as they smiled into the kiss.  
  
Eren cupped Armin’s face as he moved away, only slightly. Their foreheads still touched and they kept their eyes closed.  
  
“Eren…”  
  
Armin ignored the heat of his cheeks and forced himself to speak, “I… I’m not too sure where we’re going to go from here. But I’m sorry, for everything… I just want you back in my life. I don’t care whose fault what is, I just want you back, so I’m sorry.”  
  
“Me too.” Eren leaned in and kissed Armin again.  
  
Armin smiled and his hands nervously fumbled against each other. “Is it… true, that you dreamed about us, on a train?”  
  
“Damnit Mikasa! Her and her mouth!”  
  
Armin chuckled.  
  
Eren grinned and nodded slowly. “Yeah. We said we would go together, didn’t we? To the ocean, by train.”  
  
Armin smiled. “I’d like that.”  
  
“Great.” Eren hesitated, but he eventually slipped his arm around Armin’s waist. He opened his eyes in time to see his _boyfriend_ blush even further. “I guess that’s a good first date idea, right?”  
  
Armin opened his eyes and stared. “Huh?”  
  
“Well, why not?”  
  
“You know… I really do miss having you around.”  
  
“I do too,” Eren punctuated the sentence with another kiss.


End file.
